Be Courageous Be Vulnerable Be You

There is beauty in the broken, that is true.  Our battle wounds and scars tell a story, some of bravery and courage and others of survival and pain, and some victory and triumph.   In that beauty, lies who we are, our character, our essence, our being. But are we really broken?  

Often times I let the darkness overpower me, and I give in, feeling all my weakness.  There are days and moments in my life where this seems to be my only resolution, that I have no hope, no light at the end of the tunnel.  I am tired and beaten and the thought of getting on my hamster wheel one more day, one more hour, one more second, feels like stepping into emptiness.  But even in my darkest moments, I can find a flicker of light, a moment of laughter, a reason to smile, and the courage to move on.

When we are at our lowest, that is when we need our village, our people, our support.  Shutting the world off, crawling into a dark hole and thinking our problems will just disappear if we ignore them long enough is not the answer, nor is it ever going to happen.  Connecting with others, knowing you are not alone can give you strength to get up and fight. Because isn’t that what we do, fight? I feel like all I do sometimes is fight. Fighting the fight, grinding the grind, fail until you don’t.   

Women crave connection.  I used to believe that I needed so many friends.  I wanted to go to every social activity that I was invited to, and the ones that I wasn’t, I would visualize myself smiling and happy in their instagram post, making up all the fun stories that happened that night.  Isn’t that what we do? We torture ourselves into thinking we are missing out. We are missing out on a good time, on inside jokes and laughter, on gossiping or getting the “in” for the next big event. But what are we really missing out on?  What are we seeking? FOMO is real, but why? What we ARE craving is connection. The connection we crave as women, as moms, intensifies as we become older, as our kids and problems evolve, and as we struggle to embrace who we are.  

The fight to embrace who I am fully and wholeheartedly is real.  It is something I battle with everyday. I am learning to love myself and pieces and parts of me I do, but there are moments of doubt and judgement that rear their head and it can be damaging.  I have spent the past 5 years discovering who I am and trying to face my faults, acknowledging them and trying to understand them. Surrounding myself alongside other women, real women who aren’t afraid to be vulnerable and share their stories, has been one of the greatest gifts.  You can not receive the true essence and being of another if you are not ready and willing to be vulnerable yourself. Vulnerability breeds vulnerability, and vulnerability also breeds connection.   

I want to be heard, I want to be seen and I want to be understood.  We all do. Kids want this, men want this and we, women, mothers want this.  Find your courage, find your strength and allow yourself to be vulnerable. What you once believed a friendship to be will change and your views on life will no longer be the same.  You will experience connection on deeper levels never known to be possible, and you will start to see yourself the way others see you. You will start to become who you have always been, who you were meant to be.  You will embrace the beautiful being you are, and you will realize that you are a gift.